Shut the Gate!

 Today, Andy was transferring hay from one paddock to another via the driveway and our backyard. In context, it means opening the gate, cross over the driveway, go through the backyard gate, cross the backyard and go through the tall gate which only fits one person through. 

Andy thought he'd make it easier for himself by leaving the gates open. He thought that as the horses would be busily eating hay, they wouldn't be interested in all the gates being open. 🤣

He forked the hay onto the wheelbarrow and crossed the driveway. As he went through the gate, he looked up and saw a horse! At 17 hands high, he's hard to miss! He shut the gate behind him, called out to me and went through the tall, narrow gate which he left open. 

Harry decided to explore the backyard and eat the hay that had fallen off the wagon. Flint saw Harry over the fence and was agitated, running back and forth alongside the fence but not willing to enter through the narrow gate. 

As Harry didn't want to leave, I went and got the halter and lead rope and told Andy to shut the tall gate and calm Flint. I cornered Harry and threw the rope around him, leading him out with his mouth full of hay. Flint calmed down and after I rewarded Flint with a carrot, they went to their pile of hay.

Lesson: Shut the gate! Be watchful and don't assume that horses will be so focused on hay, that they won't notice the open gate!

Happy Ending for Tina

 Recently we had the privilege of looking after a 30 year old horse for the last 3 weeks of her life. When she came to us, she had just been washed (to get rid of lice) and she was extremely thin. In fact, she was being rescued from being euthanised in that condition. When my friend dropped her off, she said we had her to love on and make sure the rest of her days would be happy.

Flint heard her, smelt her and waited on the other side of the fence at the end of her paddock (about 100 metres) to welcome her but she saw the round bale of hay and thought she was in heaven. Both Flint and his new friend Harry waited patiently although Harry saw it as his opportunity to go and eat hay without Flint interrupting him. 

Over the next few weeks we saw Tina grow and change. Her coat became a shiny colour and the lice did not return. One time Andy saw Tina trot across the paddock to where he was offering her a biscuit of lucerne hay and some attention.

After a couple of weeks of Flint grooming her over the fence, sharing a water tank with her and him just watching her from a distance, we gave them the opportunity to share the paddock. I led Tina down to the gate that opened into their paddock where the Bay Boys were waiting. Flint followed her as she walked determinedly to their hay and paid him no attention. At one stage, she let out a squeal and Flint moved away. As she ate, Flint put his head close to hers while Harry kept his distance. 

Something happened between Flint and Tina - I think she wasn't paying him enough attention so I took Flint out and did a bit of ground work with him. Andy watched Tina and Harry but when Harry tried to befriend her, she ignored him so he trotted off to find Flint. He called out to Flint and was agitated at not being in the same paddock as him but Flint stayed focused on what I was telling him to do.

Finally I was finished with Flint so I returned him to Harry and we put Tina back in her own paddock. We often caught Flint standing watching her while Harry tucked into the hay oblivious to all else.

Yesterday morning, I went to check on Tina and her left eye was weeping and almost closed. When she opened it a bit, I could see an ulcer so she was in a lot of pain. The decision was made that she would leave us that night. I led her down to the water trough where Flint was and he tried to reach across the fence to groom her while she had a drink. She walked down to the gate hopefully, but I didn't think she'd have the strength to deal with the boys. Flint walked alongside her, then stayed next to me while she walked back to the water trough, said goodbye to Harry and returned to her hay home. 

When she left, Andy went out and gave a lot of love to Flint, then Harry. He said, "I know it is part of farm life but I haven't dealt with this before. It's hard." This is a photo with Harry but he and Flint did a lot of hugging before that.

This afternoon, as the sun setting, I walked down the driveway and there Flint was, staring at the empty space that Tina had once filled.

What we can learn from this: Love those who are with you now and enjoy the moments you share together. Be a blessing to others.

Consistency and Kindness

 One of the many principles I have learned when working with my horse is to be consistent and kind. These principles can also be applied to our family, friends and colleagues and if we are teachers, should be applied within the classroom.

First of all, it is important to just show up. Show up regularly, show up when it's a beautiful day and show up when you're having a bad day. Simply show up consistently. The good thing about showing up no matter what is, Flint doesn't care how I look or if I'm having a 'bad hair day'. He doesn't notice if I've put on weight or if my socks don't match. He's happy to see me when I'm happy or when I'm sad, when I'm tired or when I'm full of energy. I need to show up consistently.

When I am working with Flint, I need to be consistent. When I am leading him, walking by his side, he needs to know my expectations and I need to listen. Sometimes I will say to him, "I'm walking to that tree" and other times, I will just move in a way that he knows where I'm going. During this time, I often talk with him about my day, about what's happening and I point out the good things that are in our surroundings. Sometimes I am silent but we are both aware that we are together and I love it when he gives a little nicker of acknowledgement.

 Yesterday I took Flint out of his paddock and we walked up the driveway towards another paddock.  Before we got there, he flinched for a moment as we passed the gate-shed so I encouraged and reassured him and we keep walking. Every now and again I told him to 'stand' and he listened and did what I asked. I felt a little energetic so did a little jog and he quickened his walking pace. We had fun moving around the large paddock and taking in the scenery around us! We posed for photos on our way back and when we came to the gate-shed, Flint predictably balked. 

For some reason, Flint does not like walking back past the gate-shed. The first time he showed fear was a few months ago when I was riding him. He went up to the corner rather than go through the gate-shed. After some time, trying different methods, encouraging him etc he succumbed and went to catch up to his friend. A couple weeks ago, the same thing happened when I was leading him back so today I was prepared. I got my husband to dangle a carrot in front of Flint but he didn't pay any attention. He planted his feet firmly and only moved backwards, in circles or sideways but not through the gate-shed.

I took the carrot and waved it in front of his nose so he could smell it. This method worked and he got through the gate-shed and was rewarded with the carrot. It was important that I listened and responded to what Flint was 'saying' to me.

No matter what you do, consistency and kindness are important: Turn up for your friends, family and colleagues and listen. If you're a teacher find out what works best for your students and try different teaching methods. Treat all people with kindness and respect. And have fun together! 

Communication Builds the Relationship

 Building a friendship takes time, patience and good communication,  especially listening.

This morning I wanted to spend time with Flint before we went to go and celebrate my gorgeous granddaughter's 3rd birthday. I found him up in the back corner talking with a cow over the fence in the next paddock. The cow saw me coming and wandered away while Flint waited for me to approach. Finally, he took the last few remaining steps, nuzzled into me and lowered his head so I could put the headstall on him - the pink one which means 'serious work'.

We walked along the back fence line and some of the cows looked up from their grazing and lazing in the sunshine. Flint hesitated and instead of rushing him, I stopped and looked to see what he could see. I gave him a pat and we walked on. As we began the downward slope towards the dam, he stopped again.

He looked regal standing there with the blue skies and sunshine surrounding him. I chose to walk him around rather than go straight towards the dam and that worked.

When we got to the ball, I picked it up and rolled it in front of him and he touched it with his nose. We went to the smaller paddock, stopping for a selfie along the way and played with the ball a bit more. Every time he touched it, I praised him and I even rolled it a few times in front of him and he didn't flinch. We did this for some time and then I took the halter off him, gave him a bit more patting and lovin' and within moments he'd gone back to join his bovine friends.

As I reflected on the session, I thought about how well we had done together. When he had stopped, I stopped and waited, reassured and listened. If it appeared there was a problem, I tried to find another way to make it work. I listened when he was expressing hesitation and we had a good time together.

I think it's important to do that with our friends. Go to them when you see them approaching so they know it's mutual. Listen to what the other is saying, wait for them to be 'ready/on the same page' and when a problem arises, find a way forward that works for you both.

Then play ball together - have fun together.

Dream Again

It's been raining here a lot and the dam has overflowed, blocking off the track the 2 horses have made which gives them easy access to our side, as well as to Flint's feeding area. This means that to get to our side, the horses have to go around the back of the dam which is a bit longer but only takes a minute or two if they go fast. Yesterday, I stood at this side of the water and called Flint to come over.

Flint looked at the water and looked at me. He took a tentative step forward and looked around again. He could hear me calling him, encouraging him to come over and get his food but he stayed put. The birds sang, Milly (our lab) swam in the water but still he did not come.

As I stood there watching, calling and waiting I thought about how true that is of us. We know we want to get to the dream/reward but we get distracted by the obstacle that looms in front of us. The water in front of Flint is not deep and he has gone along that track many times before. He put his nose in the water, took a couple steps in, had a drink, then stepped back again. 

Jasper, the other horse went over to him. He gave Flint a little bit of grooming, then Flint moved further away up the hill. Sometimes our friends can be like that. They can be well-intentioned and even encouraging, but might remind us that the obstacle might be too hard to overcome or that it's safer to stay here. After all, who knows what is lurking between us and our goal. Perhaps they add to our doubts: Are you strong enough? Are you sure you're ready?  It's a great idea but.. What about your 'responsibilities'?

As I stood patiently waiting, calling him to come, encouraging him that he could do it, I realised that what he needed was someone to walk alongside him. He needed someone who could listen and empathise, who could see the obstacles confronting him but who could remind and support him and walk through it with him to help him reach his goal.

Perhaps you've been through a lot and you're ready to move through that stretch of water to start dreaming and hoping again. You look around and are distracted and your well-meaning friends aren't sure how to help you. One of the things I have found when going through a hard time is that I don't want to burden my friends but I need to talk to someone. I need to process my thoughts and I want to have goals and make them happen.

If you want someone like that, please know that I want to empower women to rediscover their hopes and dreams and move forward with purpose. I encourage you to find me on Facebook, join our Life Trail Conversations group (for women only) and even set up a one-on-one coaching session with me in 2024.

Life Trail Conversations

You can find hope again and it's OK to dream and make plans. So the end of the story is - my husband went around the long way and Flint followed him back rather than take the short cut through the water. 

Gentle Flint

 Today we had friends coming over for the afternoon and in the past, their 2 young boys had expressed an interest in horses. They're building a house on a property where ponies are living the life and recently their youngest son served up delicious apples to the well-fed ponies before going to toast marshmallows on their small fire.

I wondered how the horses would go as I hadn't seen them around small children. I grabbed Flint's halter and lead rope and led the entourage past the dam, over the hill of dry grass and into the shade of native trees and scrub. I kept.an eye out for snakes sunbaking in the gorgeous sunshine as I heard the crunching of the grass underfoot. 

The horses were in the hidden part of their paddock but when Flint heard me call, he ventured half way up the hill and watched us approaching. I walked down to him, gave him a pat and walked back to where the others were waiting. Flint followed and Jasper, thinking there might be treats in pockets, came close behind.

Flint stood still while hands stroked his neck and side. He lowered his head so the.youngest one could reach and the blokes stood talking and patting. Jasper let himself be patted and when he figured out there were no treats, he left Flint to enjoy the attention.

The horses followed us back to the gate and Flint hung his head over so the patting could continue. We went and made up his feed and he watched carefully, reaching for a succulent plant to munch on. The food was tipped.into his dish and he licked the bowl clean.

As our friends got ready to go, the youngest son ran to Flint.who was standing at the gate. Flint lowered his head and the boy said, "I love you. I don't want to go. I will miss you."

Building the Bond

 We've moved to a new place and have Flint with us, as well as a friend's horse, Jasper. Jasper and Flint love the new place and are so relaxed. We've started bringing in hay for them and they discovered, with their hooves, where the opening is underneath. 

Anyway,  as my friend won't be able to ride with me for a few weeks, I wondered what I should do about it. The hoof trimmer was out on Monday and she remarked about how far Flint and I have come in 6 months. She suggested that while my friend is away, I continue to work with Flint. When I expressed concern about separation anxiety between the horses, she said to practise going down the (long) driveway and increasing the distance each time etc.

I started today. As we left the paddock, Jasper called out to him over the gate and although Flint heard him, he was focused on me. The 2 little yappy dogs came running out and he ignored them. The agisted horses on the other side called out to ask him where he was going, but he kept walking alongside me and didn't bother to reply.

We went down the stony hill/ driveway and he mostly kept his space alongside me. A couple times, he came too close and I turned him around and he resumed walking properly beside me. At the bottom of the hill, I let him have some juicy, green grass as a reward.

He would have stayed and feasted longer, despite the horses calling him back, but I didn't want to push him too far. On our way back, 2 cars were coming towards us and I moved him to the side of the driveway, facing them and he stood still. The noisier car stopped and waited and we returned to the gate, where Jasper was hanging over the fence impatiently. 

He's a good boy! (Flint)